A Rebellious Heart

We will eat our own food

and provide our own clothes;

only let us be called by your name…. (Is 4:1).

We cannot have God in the way that we want Him on our terms. We don’t have the right to call the shots and run the show. We can try, but we will only further divide ourselves from biblical truth. Whenever we try to manipulate God into being who we want Him to be, we will always sell ourselves short from growing into the person God desires for us to be in Christ.
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Sometimes God asks us to walk through difficult and painful valleys. We need not fear the journey, but instead embrace it with joy because we know that even in the darkness, our Father leads us. Truly, he is with us in those painful, desert seasons.
Have you ever tried to run from God’s healing when all He wanted to do was love you through something hard and painful? I have. I’ve been fearful of what might happen if I truly trusted God, so I just didn’t trust Him and kept trying to pave my own way.
A rebel’s heart is not what God desires, but I have seen this rebel heart at work in me because I have been terribly selfish and focused not on others, but on whats best for me. In doing so, I’ve hurt not just my walk with God and my pursuit of truth, but my relationships with those I love the most. You see, when you’re living in places of manipulation with God, you’ll excuse your behavior if it means that you get to behave how you want and somehow call it “God’s will.”
Until we listen, with ears and hearts ready to receive grace by walking in humility, we will only hear our own voice and believe that it is somehow God’s voice. If God says, x, y or z, but our fear, insecurity, and pride convince us to believe otherwise, then in our places of unhealthiness and manipulation, we will try to put God in our own little box. But you see, in our little boxes, people can’t fit in there, so in order to protect ourselves we’ll keep people out and at the end of the day, we’ll shut God out too.
The only way to be free is to let go and go with God into the valley. Yes, the only way to walk in God’s healing is to lean into God’s truth. Truly, He is for us. If we believe that and embrace His truth without fear then we can rest assured that the Father’s heart is for us. He walks with us and He leads us beside quiet waters.
Lord, help us. We need your grace. Forgive us for manipulating our relationship with you. Help me to walk in the light of your truth, even when it’s hard and requires humility, in Jesus name, Amen.

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